Lesbianism Can Cure Writer's Block

What to do when you're suffering from musical writer's block? One suggestion, keep shuffling through your entire iTunes music library until something inspires you.

Well, I'm going to blame the following post on that 'genius' idea I had while sitting on the floor of Penn Station waiting for my boyfriend to show up sometime before midnight. I figured there's no time like the present to try and force some creativity to flow but I was afraid if I tried to pick a song to fit my impatient and lonesome mood this post would turn out quite depressing. Therefore, I choose to shuffle, shuffle, shuffle and what did I land on...? The suspense is killing you, I know:

I Kissed a Girl by Katy Perry

Now, why on Earth did this song (of all songs) inspire me, you ask? Well, I guess it's because quite a few vivid memories of this song came rushing to mind all at once. The first of which includes my then 9 year old little brother singing along to this gem in the car. He knew ALL the words. I was feeling kind of bad - more like a bad influence really - because I don't see the kid all that often and here I was speeding down the road with all the windows down and singing over the blaring radio that was playing my kind of music. You might argue that at moments like this the 13 year age difference between us makes it more like an aunt to nephew sort of relationship. In his eyes I have money, access to a car, and therefore am a super cool grown-up-ish big sister who can afford to lavish attention on him a few times a year. Of course, then I hear him singing along and I realize "Duh... he's already got two teenage sisters at home who are corrupting him... I can't do much worse!"

Another little vignette this song brought to mind also involves a car... this time, instead of me speeding, you can picture a stationary automobile with myself in the passenger seat. This image is altogether much safer and should ease the weary minds of those who know all too well my penchant for bad driving. Let's just say, I used to try and make my poor Jeep Wrangler do things that it just really could not do. Ironically enough, although my mother purchased my first vehicle with hopes that it's lack of 'get up and go' would keep me in line, it probs would have been safer to buy me a sports car. At least then I'd be attempting my Mario moves in a vehicle meant to handle my recklessness. But, I digress.

Picture, if you will, a parked car with my gal pal Kailea behind the wheel. Her poor brother had to exit the backseat and wander around the abandoned parking lot to avoid our singing. Did I mention we were singing? Oh yes, we were. Then, lo and behold, Katy Perry comes on the radio and we both in unison cry out, "OMG I love this song."

Yes, it was unison and yes, we did actually say O-M-G instead of 'Oh My God.' Are you really surprised? I mean, we were gushing over "I Kissed a Girl." We decided that since we both had such love of this great piece of lyrical genius, why not share it will all the other cars in the parking lot? There were not many - only a few others who didn't mind walking the few blocks to the fire works if it meant being able to be the first ones out later because we parked so far away. So we rolled down all the windows and proceeded to belt out the melody like the lives of our little lungs depended upon it. We got a few strange looks and even more disturbing we got a "woo hoo" and "ow ow" from a bald biker dude. But hey, it was the 4th of July! Why not celebrate the wide array that is Americana? We kissed a girl, and we liked it! Woo Hoo America!

That's really all I got for now... honestly, writing while sitting on the cold, dirty floor of New York Penn Station with your nose running from the janitor sweeping all the dust into the air is NOT very inspiring...

Any total random songs that inspire you? Why don't you shuffle through your iPod and share with me the first song that actually inspired you to think of something, anything... do share.

Until next time, this is Megs saying good luck with writer's block and waiting on public transportation and remember that inspiration can come out of nowhere...

I Had a Beatle Watching Over Me

Last night, I managed to miss my subway after class even though I was standing right there as it arrived. How is that possible, you ask? Well, because I was walking along the side of it trying to get as close to the first car as possible and suddenly I was surrounded by a bunch of Asian tourists! I'd been grooving to some good tunes on my iPod, feeling good about catching this train so I could get home in time to do some writing before my boyfriend got home... but I was waylaid! *sigh* Of course, at the time I didn't just sigh and get over it. I proceeded to curse and punch one of those signs that shows all the stops the train makes. Yeah, I don't suggest ever doing that. It hurt like a bitch. Suppose I deserved that...

The funny thing is, the very next song to come on my iPod was "Hey Jude" by The Beatles. It was the second time that day my iPod choose to play that song while shuffling through my over 800 different selections. Was God trying to tell me something? Relax? Follow my dreams? Get the girl? Wait, no.... I'm not a lesbian, so I guess it can't be that last one. Maybe I rely too much on Fate. I mean, it is just an iPod right?

Or maybe it really is simple: "Take a sad song, and make it better." Spin it. Look at the positive. Take control of your own fucked up emotions and do something with your life. I mean, that is what Mommy was trying to say earlier that afternoon, right? Of course, she's also made the astute observation before that I am the type of person who performs well under stress. When I have too much free time I turn into the sort of pathetic sulking blob one might picture inspired such a tune as, "Hey Jude." I mean, really, it is pretty simple, insipid, Hallmark-esque advice. "Hey Jude, don't make it bad." Jeebus, my 6th graders could have come up with something better than that!

But you do gotta hand it to them Beatles, they do know how to get a song stuck in your head. Those damn "na na na naaas" from the end of "Hey Jude" just bounce around in my head for hours after I hear that song. I find myself "na na na-ing" to myself as like a "get it together" kind of mantra.

It would seem that I had a Beatle as my guardian angel last night. Those na, na, nas sure did soothe my bruised ego at having missed a train that was right in front of me! Of course, I got so inspired to write about it that once I got on the next E train I forgot that I was only going one stop and I inadvertently flew right by it!

As I sat and sat and sat waiting for my train heading back in the opposite direction (which of course had stopped running so I ended up walking a few blocks over to the 7 instead) my guardian angel decided to play for me, "Let it Be."  That song is another very simple Beatles hit and yet I find it to be very moving.  I really think that image of "Mother Mary comes to me" is beautiful and uplifting.  As a child, I used to imagine being upset and all of a sudden feeling a warm, white light cover me.  Then, I would look up and see a woman with kind eyes, pale skin, and soft features smile at me benevolently and tell me to have faith.  

Now, when I hear that song, I also think of that scene in the movie "Across the Universe."  If you haven't seen this movie, you must! Whether or not you are a Beatles fan, this movie is beautiful, musical, and powerful.  This particular scene I have included is one of the most moving sections of the film.  It is hard to put into words so I will simply say it puts into perspective atrocities of our nation's history in a way no text book ever has for me.  

In closing, I guess this entry goes to show that music can be there for us in "times of trouble" even if Mother Mary cannot.  I think that the power of music to soothe, to cheer us up, to just plain make life easier to get through is something that transcends.

So, what is your go to song when you need a boost? Have you ever found yourself rescued by a song? Post a comment and let me know.

Until next time, this is Megs saying music is everywhere and if you let it in it can change your mood, your life, and even your soul... 

Classic Dreams Sometimes Come True Unconventionally

Sometimes I am amazed at how the same song can make me feel such a wide range of varying emotions depending on the different mood I'm in or circumstances in which I find myself when I listen to it.  A happy-go-lucky dance beat can make me feel morose if I'm lonely, broke, and have no one to go out dancing with that night.  Also, a sad break-up tune can inspire relief when I realize that I've found that someone I've been looking for so long.

But I think the music that lends itself most to mutable emotions is classical.  Take for example my personal favorite, "Clair de Lune" by Claude Debussy.  I have a myriad of different associations with this classical tune.  I first remember listening to it while on retreat with my youth choir when I was still in middle school.  Our director was a firm believer in expanding our musical education as well as perfecting our vocal performance.  It was late in the evening after dinner and the sun had already set when Mrs. Allen gathered us all together in the main lodge to play some music for us.  Many of us had already changed into PJs and we settled onto coaches or snuggled up with friends under blankets on the floor while we listened to an entire Debussy CD.  I remember sitting off by myself staring out the window as a kaleidoscope of images danced in my mind.  I pictured far off places that I'd never visited - truth be told, I've still yet to go to Europe.  But back then, when I was just a middle schooler singing classic choir pieces I dreamt of a glamorous life stretching out before me forever.

Now, when I hear that song I picture the love of my life - a man who refers to the beloved Debussy piece as "musical crack."  It would seem that I found someone who is transported away to other worlds just by listening to beautiful music just as I always have been.  Of course, we can thank Stephanie Meyer for making "Clair de Lune" the must have romantic song now that Edward Cullen says it's his favorite.  And to think, I thought pop culture would only allow me to associate the song with the look of accomplishment on the faces of Brad Pitt & Co at the end of "Ocean's 11."  Actually, if you take time to notice, you will see that "Clair de Lune" makes an appearance in tons of movies and television shows.  It's pretty remarkable.  

So, what is it about the song that touches people? What makes it the perfect background for many a poignant moment? I'm not sure I can really say.  I do know that I am filled with a profound peace whenever I hear it.  It makes me feel like even in the deepest melancholy there is potential for something more.  When I hear Debussy today, I believe that my promising future is still out there waiting.  Maybe it is in my writing... who knows? But the fact that I have the love of someone who supports me, inspires me - hell, he requested I write an entry about "Clair de Lune" - that shows me that real happiness and the kind of pure bliss I feel while listening to that song can exist.  

Is there a song out there that gives you hope? Or maybe it's a person? Post a comment and share with me as I have with you today.  

Until next time, this is Megs saying don't be afraid to be vulnerable and to have hope because the rewards are always worth the risk...     

The Risk of Imagining

I'm sitting in the McDonald's at the corner of Greenpoint Ave by the G train in Brooklyn and I was thinking to myself that I should probably update my new blog that I promised myself I'd write in everyday... well, I was on vacation give me a break!

Anyways, I was thinking of the list of different songs that I want to write about that I made on the plane ride back from San Antonio. But then, out of nowhere, I am surprised to hear the opening chords to "Imagine" by John Lennon. I must admit I was really surprised because I had not been feeling the tunes at this Mickey D's until that moment. I was busy trying to decide whether or not I should take a quick subway trip over to the Target location on Flatbush even though the reviews on Google for that location are horrid. I figure, 'how hard can it be to find what I need? I used to work at a Target for Pete's sake!"

Of course, if I go to Target, I will without a doubt spend money that I don't have. Furthermore, I haven't yet timed the distance between my boyfriend's new place and Hunter College so I'm afraid to chance being late.  So I thought, "why not write in my blog?" It sure is cheaper than going to Target.  Then, just as I was opening up the web page, I heard John Lennon sing:

Imagine there's no Heaven 
It's easy if you try 
No hell below us 
Above us only sky 
Imagine all the people 
Living for today 

Imagine there's no countries 
It isn't hard to do 
Nothing to kill or die for 
And no religion too 
Imagine all the people 
Living life in peace 

You may say that I'm a dreamer 
But I'm not the only one 
I hope someday you'll join us 
And the world will be as one 

Imagine no possessions 
I wonder if you can 
No need for greed or hunger 
A brotherhood of man 
Imagine all the people 
Sharing all the world 

You may say that I'm a dreamer 
But I'm not the only one 
I hope someday you'll join us 
And the world will live as one 

When I was in 8th grade, my choir teacher asked us each to bring our favorite song lyrics.  She said that it didn't need to be our favorite song.  It just had to be lyrics that meant something to us.  I brought in the lyrics to "Imagine" and also wore my favorite John Lennon t-shit with the lyrics on the back for good measure! The front of the t-shirt was a picture of Lennon in his big sunglasses and a "New York City" t-shirt on.  While wearing that shirt and reciting those lyrics to my classmates, I felt particularly bohemian and I 'imagined' a world where my NSYNC lyric reading classmates would be inspired by Lennon's words and decide to look past labels, cliques, race, class... or whatever other stupid nonsense separates human beings from just loving and accepting each other.  

When I finished my recitation of those moving lyrics, I awoke from my own reverie to see girls passing each other the inside booklets from their Top 40 CD cases or their computer print-outs of hip-hop lyrics (these of course would have to be edited when read aloud in class).  The only person in the room with an expression of rapt attention on their face was my teacher.  When I made eye contact with her, she gave me a broad smile that said, "I still have hope for this generation."  My teacher asked me to explain to my classmates why I had chosen that song to share.  I couldn't tell you now what I said, all I know is I can clearly remember my own heart sinking to my ankles as the obvious disinterest from my classmates turned to a low rumble of not so silent ridicule that made me cut-off mid-sentence and retreat back to my seat.  How dare I ruin a day that was supposed to be dedicated to mindless reaffirmation of all things popular and teenage with my attempt at reaching out through inspiring, thought-provoking lyrics? Well... I guess that's why the title of the song is "Imagine."  We aren't there yet, but maybe - just maybe - if enough of us are able to imagine something better we might just imagine it into being.

Oh, and by the way, the next girl in line to share her lyrics... she read "Digital Getdown" by NSYNC.